Stuck

Stuck:

I'm feeling stuck
between a space
recognizing so many different avenues
Desiring a chase
I constantly battle regular verse remarkable
I'm stuck while time keeps moving
I can't seem to find my way
Like a record that just keeps spinning
lost in literal translation

feeling free AND complacent

done with people fakin'
I need a platform to display my true testament
prove my abilities
and stop living with this resentment
this self loathing and loving that I wake to each day
this war on my inner self
this derailing high speed train of the cards I'm delt
Or am I the dealer
Do I spend hours and days dealing with the cards I deal myself
I'm caught in the emotion
still spinning
hurting
recognizing a good thing can't find me till I'm complete
Is this true, I mean
who will accept my power and my defeat
stuck!
I'm looking to capture more
I know
more to this life than what I can see
seeking ways
motivated
yelling back at life "I'm God's creation"
looking around me now
lacking the motivation
Angry at the time spent coaching myself
to not be where I want to be
There's the 'pain' card I'm dealt
The swords continue to draw as I
pull the gun on stagnance
and trample over perfection saying
"I am a continued work in progress"
Hurting my process
I wake to the same battle
alone, confused,
committed one moment and lost the next
can't seem to find the return button
"fast forward" I scream
Press rewind
Hit play
My reality declines
I'm stuck!